[If you were my Master-- is that what this offer is, then? An attempt to fake a part of the connection that would have been forged if the contract had worked? Even so... it's dizzying, the thought of being so open with another person. Surely, she thinks, not every single piece of his life has been written down as exacting as he says. Surely there are parts that have remained purely his own, untouched by a poet's pen.
Surely, she thinks, because she knows that is how the Hero of Time will be remembered.
The world shifts around her, but she pays it little mind, more focused upon the confusion and inner turmoil Caster's words have stirred inside her head. Are they still holding hands? Because she's going to stare at that if they are, like their interlaced fingers will tell her what she's supposed to think about this if she just stares them down long enough.]
I-- I do not... understand what is selfish about it, exactly...
[She offers after a moment, hesitantly, the simplest part of this conversation that she's having difficulty figuring out.]
[ Caster has no intention of letting go of her hand, unless she wants to. It's amazing that warmth of her hand is still something he experiences so vividly in the dream- or maybe he does because of it? ]
Really? It's a unique way to meet. Phones, internet, everyone got them- [ Not everyone like to or are equally versed in using them, but that's another matter. ] -but meeting in a dream, that's something only you can do.
[ Hence selfish. Obviously, she can visit other people, he doesn't mind that, and has no business in asking how it is to visit different dreams. ]
So, it's something only "yours" you could say.
[ In a way she might be right, a unique connection that can happen only here in this place beside anyone else's reach. Or he's just a romantic at heart. ]
[It should be more awkward than it is, she thinks, just... holding hands like this. There's no need for it, they're not doing anything, she should take her hand back now-- and yet, there it stays. Probably because she's too distracted thinking about everything else. Yes, that must be it.]
... I see. It is selfish because it is not something you would experience with anyone else.
[That's depersonalizing things a bit, making it about the experience and not her, but it's easier to make sense of that way. Hesitantly, she glances back up to his face.]
And... this is something you want me to do?
[If anything is left up to what she wants to do, it's never going to get done, so used to denying her own desires that she is. But if it's something someone else wants from her, someone she holds in high regard... then that's a little easier for her to swallow.]
[ That's not princess missing the point, that's one walking past it, maybe on purpose, maybe not- dragging along a ton of baggage.
No one ever said this is going to be easy. So he just admits with a sheepish smile. ]
I think it's the other way around, princess.
[ Less of "what" and "with who". Not about an experience that can't happen with anyone else, but about an experience that can happy with only her. But perhaps that's something better left for a talk in reality. He fans his fingers out for a moment, not to break their hold but to tighten his grip, more secure. Then he moves closer, suddenly so close that their noses touch. ]
But I'll let you figure that out.
[ He can be coy too- but it's less about that, and more about not pushing too strong forward, giving time, giving space. Or maybe it's just keeping safe, avoiding the risk of rejection, who knows. ]
The other way-- [She begins to parrot, questioning, until the words suddenly die in her throat.
He's close. Closer than anyone's ever been to her. And even if she is on some level blinding herself to the obvious, she is not so ignorant as to not know what could be done if that last little space between them were to disappear. For one brief moment, she's frozen in place, mind blank as wide blue eyes stare into bright red ones... but her body seems to work on instinct, and her lips part slightly, as though to receive him--
And then her mind returns to her. She leans back to put space between them again, looking down and away as that familiar flush colors her face.]
You are-- the most absurd man I have ever met. Will I ever know peace from your teasing?
[Teasing. Yes. That's what this is. That's all this is. That's all it can be. Just teasing, nothing more.]
[ The funny - "Funny" - part is that- it wasn't much of teasing.
So that went a little too far so it seems. How obvious can he get? There are multiple possibilities at play here, that he really isn't as obvious as he thinks he is or that princess knows but refuses to acknowledge it. Which again branches out into - won't because "nope", won't because "be fucking direct for once dude", won't because "a lot of Important Reasons". Neverending possibilities and he never was one to overthink much, so he's not even going to bother to come up with more alternatives. ]
I wasn't joking or making fun of you. [ He clarifies, moving away, disconnecting and lying on the grass again. Eyes closing, apparently, you can sleep in your sleep, though dreaming of not being able to fall asleep is probably one of the most frustrating things to experience. ]
That is a thing I'd rather say properly in reality, though. Another good reason to finally wake up.
[Her hand is her own again, and she feels-- cold. Which is also absurd, really, because this is a dream, but. She can't shake the feeling like she's done something wrong.
I wasn't joking or making fun of you.
She would understand if she allowed herself to think about it, but she doesn't. It scares her, almost to the same extent that being honest scares her (exactly to the same extent, really, because what is she doing if not deceiving herself?), and so she clamps down on that thought before it can come to fruition, shoving it down into the darkness where she keeps all the things she would rather not think about herself.
She clasps her hands over her chest as she stands, like that will banish the sudden chill she feels. Like it will hide rabbit-like thumping of her heart.]
I... will let you get your rest, then.
[She turns. The leaves of the tree flutter in a non-existent wind, and in the next moment, she's gone.]
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no subject
Surely, she thinks, because she knows that is how the Hero of Time will be remembered.
The world shifts around her, but she pays it little mind, more focused upon the confusion and inner turmoil Caster's words have stirred inside her head. Are they still holding hands? Because she's going to stare at that if they are, like their interlaced fingers will tell her what she's supposed to think about this if she just stares them down long enough.]
I-- I do not... understand what is selfish about it, exactly...
[She offers after a moment, hesitantly, the simplest part of this conversation that she's having difficulty figuring out.]
no subject
Really? It's a unique way to meet. Phones, internet, everyone got them- [ Not everyone like to or are equally versed in using them, but that's another matter. ] -but meeting in a dream, that's something only you can do.
[ Hence selfish. Obviously, she can visit other people, he doesn't mind that, and has no business in asking how it is to visit different dreams. ]
So, it's something only "yours" you could say.
[ In a way she might be right, a unique connection that can happen only here in this place beside anyone else's reach. Or he's just a romantic at heart. ]
no subject
... I see. It is selfish because it is not something you would experience with anyone else.
[That's depersonalizing things a bit, making it about the experience and not her, but it's easier to make sense of that way. Hesitantly, she glances back up to his face.]
And... this is something you want me to do?
[If anything is left up to what she wants to do, it's never going to get done, so used to denying her own desires that she is. But if it's something someone else wants from her, someone she holds in high regard... then that's a little easier for her to swallow.]
no subject
No one ever said this is going to be easy. So he just admits with a sheepish smile. ]
I think it's the other way around, princess.
[ Less of "what" and "with who". Not about an experience that can't happen with anyone else, but about an experience that can happy with only her. But perhaps that's something better left for a talk in reality. He fans his fingers out for a moment, not to break their hold but to tighten his grip, more secure. Then he moves closer, suddenly so close that their noses touch. ]
But I'll let you figure that out.
[ He can be coy too- but it's less about that, and more about not pushing too strong forward, giving time, giving space. Or maybe it's just keeping safe, avoiding the risk of rejection, who knows. ]
no subject
He's close. Closer than anyone's ever been to her. And even if she is on some level blinding herself to the obvious, she is not so ignorant as to not know what could be done if that last little space between them were to disappear. For one brief moment, she's frozen in place, mind blank as wide blue eyes stare into bright red ones... but her body seems to work on instinct, and her lips part slightly, as though to receive him--
And then her mind returns to her. She leans back to put space between them again, looking down and away as that familiar flush colors her face.]
You are-- the most absurd man I have ever met. Will I ever know peace from your teasing?
[Teasing. Yes. That's what this is. That's all this is. That's all it can be. Just teasing, nothing more.]
no subject
So that went a little too far so it seems. How obvious can he get? There are multiple possibilities at play here, that he really isn't as obvious as he thinks he is or that princess knows but refuses to acknowledge it. Which again branches out into - won't because "nope", won't because "be fucking direct for once dude", won't because "a lot of Important Reasons". Neverending possibilities and he never was one to overthink much, so he's not even going to bother to come up with more alternatives. ]
I wasn't joking or making fun of you. [ He clarifies, moving away, disconnecting and lying on the grass again. Eyes closing, apparently, you can sleep in your sleep, though dreaming of not being able to fall asleep is probably one of the most frustrating things to experience. ]
That is a thing I'd rather say properly in reality, though. Another good reason to finally wake up.
[ Could he stay here for too long? Probably ]
no subject
I wasn't joking or making fun of you.
She would understand if she allowed herself to think about it, but she doesn't. It scares her, almost to the same extent that being honest scares her (exactly to the same extent, really, because what is she doing if not deceiving herself?), and so she clamps down on that thought before it can come to fruition, shoving it down into the darkness where she keeps all the things she would rather not think about herself.
She clasps her hands over her chest as she stands, like that will banish the sudden chill she feels. Like it will hide rabbit-like thumping of her heart.]
I... will let you get your rest, then.
[She turns. The leaves of the tree flutter in a non-existent wind, and in the next moment, she's gone.]